When Life Hands you Lemons

I’m honestly like, so sad right now. The seniors are leaving! Wahhhh.

This year would have been terrible if not for the seniors. My classes would have been boring, and I wouldn’t have had anybody to look up to.

I’m so immature. I can’t go through any one situation without asking someone for guidance or help. And this year, it had been a certain few that I kept pestering with questions about things.

We’re going to be seniors next year! Ahh! Responsibility! Elder-ness! Maturity! Stuff I lack.

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I’m dismayed to the point where I can think of no words (except “dismayed” ) to express my feeling at this moment.

I wish I could turn back the clock to October. and play over and over and over and over.

I’m scared for next year.

-edit-

And to seniors of Russian IV: I will miss you the most. Alex and I will never forget the days we listen to the rest of you argue over petty things. It honestly makes my day sometimes.

Schools is going to be so empty next year.

Okay. I have to fume here for a second.

The first half of the year, I tried. I think. Well, I tried. Yeah. I ended up with pretty bad grades.

By mid-3rd quarter, I had an F in English. 36%. So I gave up.

Yeah. I gave up.

But by the end of the quarter I had a C in English. .1% away from a C+.

Now I have a high B. I still haven’t tried.

What the freak.

Oh yeah.

Our orchestra has one chair test before every concert where the teacher listens to us play excerpts from pieces we’re going to be performing.

For the second concert’s piece, I practiced every day, about an hour a day. After chair testing, I had found that I moved down a chair.

This concert’s piece, I probably practiced ten minutes total. I moved up six chairs.

Why didn’t I give up sooner?

I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about my taste in girls.. and I’ve come to this conclusion:

I’m a very traditional Chinese guy. I like little things. Like feet. And people. But that doesn’t mean that I find tall people repulsive or anything. I just prefer littler people.

Now, one of the reasons I’m saying this is this: just because you’re shorter than others, or have a smaller butt (or no butt at all), doesn’t mean that nobody’s going to like you, okay? I can guarantee you that I’m not the only traditional Chinese person on the face of the earth. So stop destroying your bodies by trying to be like those people you see on the cover of Vogue magazine or whatever it’s called. Be yourself. That’s what we like to see.

—-

This isn’t actually what I intended on writing in the first place, but I forgot what I was going to write and this thought popped up in my head. so.

Charles Darwin coined the term “natural selection” when he thought he discovered evolution. I’ve been juggling the term in my mind for a pretty long time, thinking, “what’s the opposite of natural selection?” and such. I came to the conclusion that the opposite of natural selection is artificial selection. But what does that mean?

Dictionary.com defines “artificial” as “made by human skill; produced by humans.”

Well, if we, as natural beings, hunted a species to extinction, wouldn’t that be natural selection? I mean. I’m all for saving certain species of animal, but isn’t that what they’re there for? We aren’t doing anything different with them than what other animals do to others. Like wolves and deer. Besides, there’s a 100% chance of that species dying out anyways.

—

Space is crazy big.

It has come to my attention that six out of the eight people I am closest to have drunk in secret. Out of their parents’ sight. All have drunk enough to notice a change in their vision or whatnot. So they’ve all gotten buzzed or drunk.

This pisses me off. I try to reason with them that it’s not what they should be doing.  They all try to tell me that “it won’t be a problem” and that I “shouldn’t worry about it.”

Well, one of my best friends told me that last month and now he’s a freaking alcoholic. Even though he won’t admit it.

Some of you will tell me that it’s “not a big deal.” Yes, it is. It is a big freaking deal.  You’re throwing away your futures. You’re drowning them in your materialistic attempts in pleasing yourself through substances. Plus, you’re underage. You’re breaking the freaking law.

“You break the law all the time, Jason.” No, I don’t. I stopped downloading things. I gave it up because it’s wrong. It took me a huge effort to stop because I’d been doing it for so long. But you drinkers. Your bodies will get used to the alcohol intake and if you quit cold turkey the way I did, you’re going to die.

Now I’ve lost too many relatives to let this happen to any of my friends.

Stop it. Stop it now. Even though I do realize that you won’t take heed to my attempts to stop you from destroying yourselves.

I think censorship is a little counter-productive. Especially censorship in the United States. At least, verbal censorship.

If you think about it, people sometimes only half-censor what they’re saying, like instead of saying the “f” word, they’ll say “f**k” or “S**t” for the “s” word. And when people get yelled at for saying certain words in front of children…

The children will eventually catch on.

As a child, I was smart enough to figure out some of these words on my own. The “f” word included. From the failed censorship I figured out that those words were supposed to be censored and that they could be used as bad words–something that I may not have known otherwise. So I don’t think there really is a point, anymore, in censoring words.

Instead, we should censor visual things. Butts. Boobs. Other things. You can’t really half-censor a butt if you cover the whole thing up.

I think we should also reverse society’s desensitization, even glorification, of violence. Blood = bad.