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Me?

Very recently, my mom has made me wake up every morning at eight o’ clock. One hour of reading Chinese, one hour of watching Korean dramas to improve my Korean, and two hours of studying math, she says.

A few days ago, I picked up a Chinese book and read through it. It was a Chinese version of The Tortoise and the Hare. At the end of it, she pointed out to me that this story could be applied directly to my academic life.

You all know the story of the tortoise and the hare. The hare, an arrogant and confident fool, challenges everybody to a race, and nobody stands up to him except the tortoise.  The race goes on and eventually the hare gets so far ahead that he decides to take a nap. He wakes up a few hours later and notices that the tortoise has already passed him and is so close to the finish line that the hare cannot catch up and pass him.

I, here, am the hare. I started my academic life in the Challenge Program (Summit, as you Mukilteo-ites would call it). Up until sixth grade (I was still in elementary school). I remember very clearly that  we were doing Geometry. The kind with proofs and finding exterior angles of polygons.  You know, the kind most people do in high school. We read books like Tom Sawyer.

Then we had family issues. Stuff happened. Money ran dry. We had to move. I moved to the house I’m in now. I had to transfer schools.

Seventh grade. I’m put in a class filled with seventh graders. Probablilty. Whoo! (At the time, I was thinking, “Crap. I don’t remember how to do this. Lemme see if I can skip this class.” I’ve never told anybody that before.) So I went up a level to Algebra I. That’s a level lower than Geometry. I asked the teacher if I could skip it and she said no; it was a high-school credit course. I needed the credit. I could take no test to pass it.

So I dealt with it. I took the class, didn’t try at all. Passed with an A. This is the year when my “nap” began.

8th grade, Geometry. No try. Passed.

9th grade. Transcript begins to count. Report card: 5 A’s, 1 C. C was in English. ” I argued with the teacher about this grade. Half-hearted arguing, I would say. I gave up on it.

10th grade. Report card: 3 A’s. 1 C, 1 D, 1 F. Begged the “F” teacher to show mercy. He didn’t.  Have to retake the class next year.

See where I’m going with this? 10th grade is when the “tortoise” has caught up to the “hare.” The class I failed was the one I was ahead in. Now I’m with people I’m supposed to be with.

Hopefully I wake up from this nap before it’s too late.

But let’s think about the moral of the story: “Slow and steady wins the race.”

Is this true? Do people who go slowly and take their time ultimately win in the end?

Personally, I don’t think this is true. I think “Fast and steady wins the race.” But there have been stories of people who have not finished high school who are more rich than those who have Ph.Ds.

But that doesn’t seem very common.

In fact, it seems like a downright lie.

But maybe it is true.

Maybe slow and steady DOES win the race.

Maybe most who excel now will just have dead-end jobs in the future.

While others who have trouble at school learn the hardships of life and use it to their advantage.

But where is my life going?

Only God knows.

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Protected: A Dedication

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FAQ session.

Hey, a few of my friends are having problems with school, life, parents… you know, the usual.

Is there any advice you can give to them, to you know, cope with their frustration, anger, and sadness?

Appreciate it.

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Things I have noticed about myself (in one specific part of life)

Alright, but this is a little personal….

I noticed this about a week ago.

Everybody likes people.

Whether it be of an opposite gender, or of the same one.

And by like, I mean like as in *crush* like.

Sorry if it sounds feminine.

I’ve noticed that since I moved over to this district (seventh grade), I’ve liked girls, but throughout the school year, there’s always been one girl that I’ve liked from beginning to end, and a few girls on the side that I liked less.

But every year, the “like” for the main girl gets weaker and weaker.

In eighth grade, when I actually knew people well enough,  I liked this one girl, and I actually asked her out! But I got a “no.”

In ninth grade, I liked someone, and when Valentine’s Day came around, I kind of walked alongside her and opened my mouth… she looked at me expectantly, but I didn’t say anything. I stopped liking her after that.

Tenth grade. I have yet to even approach this girl about anything.

I don’t know why. The main girl through the year, I barely talk to. Mostly because:
1) I like her from the start and I don’t have the guts to talk to her because.. well… I like her.
2) The girls on the side, I only start liking because I talk to them a lot and know them well.

I’m sure some of you know who some of these people are. Some of you are traitors. I know this for a fact. Please, if I tell you anything about who I like, don’t share it with other people. It’s not like I do it to you.

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Dear ______

Look, man. I’ve known you since… second grade?

I remember when we were such great friends.

You, me and Tong-whoon  tested for our second degrees at the same time.

You used to be so friendly. I don’t remember, but I’m sure we used to be best friends.

And then…

And then.

I had to quit taekwondo.

I….

I…. Didn’t see you for a few years.

Then.

I had to move to the Mukilteo School District.

I saw you on the first day of OV. You were pretty cool, I guess.

But after all those years of not seeing you, I didn’t know you anymore.

We shared a few classes here and there, then.

8th grade rolled around.

I couldn’t believe it.

At the beginning of the year, you were…. yourself. You were a cool guy.

But by the end.

I had seen that you had turned into….

Someone…

Someone who I really despise.

Orchestra auditions.

You got into 2nd, but I got into 1st.

You  basically tore yourself down because you didn’t do as well as I did.

We had a nice, sit-down chat after the end of 8th grade. I won’t forget it.

You asked me what other people were saying about you. I did the same.

I told you. “[He] doesn’t like you. You’re being way too arrogant.”

“Alright. I’ll work on it.”

9th grade.

You got even worse.

Italy.

You left all of us Sophomores to go hang out with the upperclassmen.

It created distance between us.

Distance that is still there today.

Orch Auditions.

You got into Kammerstriech.

You pointed at my face and laughed.

Literally.

10th grade.

I avoided you at all costs.

I wanted to avoid the drama.

The few times I DID talk to you, though…

It was alright.

Orchestra party.

Arrogance.

It exploded.

Now I have a new hatred for you.

A hatred that cannot be explained.

I’m trying.

I’m trying to forgive you.

But it’s difficult.

Difficult.